Long time no write here I know, I'm sorry for that, I had started a tumblr blog and so I've been doing some writing there, but I just really havent been doing a ton of online writing these past months, life has been pretty crazy at times...but I'm back and I'm going to make sure to post more...so yeah I really do want to build this blog back up too...
anyway my last post was in July...let see since then...
-the ex left....he's living with his dad
-in Aug I went to Alturas CA to visit one of my sisters, that was so fun =) she and I had fun together
-court date in sept...final judgement was ruled...I got most custody of the girls (the ex agreed to it....)
-Divorce officially FINAL Sept 25
-in Oct the girls and I took a train to Denver CO to see my other sister, that was a blast, she got married, I was her maid of honor, and it was a really beautiful wedding, and we hadnt seen eachother in over 2 years so it was awesome to reconnect in person and be crazy together again lol.
-came back home oct 16th and the ex took the girls for a few days
-I moved into MY OWN PLACE!!!!!! I got my own 2 bedroom apartment! it is SO cute I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!!
-girls came back like three days later, that was the last I heard from him for a month...I tried contacting him to see if he wanted to see them but apparently he had better things to do then see his kids...he finally contacted me a few days before thanksgiving, he tried to blame the lack of contacting on me for only texting him BUT if he had wanted to see his kids he could have called or texted me or asked me how they were....but no...anyway he wanted to take the girls for either thanksgiving or christmas....I said no....my reasons are if he didnt want to see them on a regular day then why should he (someone who does NOTHING for them 90% of the time) get to take them on a special day...sorry...I am all for him taking them after...but I am getting them for the paticular days this year...so I had the girls on thanksgiving....it was really nice...so now he thinks he's getting them for christmas because I had them for turkey day, I've told him he's not but he thinks he is...and that infurriates me....because the way he acts it's his way or no way...he tries to say its coz he "cares" about his kids....I actually laughed at that and I told him if he really cared he would have called or contacted me during that month and at least asked HOW THEY WERE DOING....but no....not even that....when he has them I call and text at least once a DAY to ask how they are...and to ask him to kiss them for me...but yeah....so I'm sorry but he cannot have them christmas day...it is our FIRST christmas in our new apartment! He has proven by his actions (actions speak LOUDER then words) that he only wants them when it's convienent for him, if it's not convienent then he couldnt be bothered...and when a person goes a whole month not even inquiring about the wellfare of his spawn I'm sorry but no....he doesnt get them for the biggest major holiday of the year...not gonna happen....and I will not allow him to bully me (coz thats what his actions have always done) into caving...I'm not giving in...now if he wants to have them the day after or even in the afternoon on christmas, I'm open to it...I had asked him if he was wanting to take them before and he said well yeah christmas is still a month away...I kinda laughed again at that and I told him well "you didn't get them last month so how am I to know"
but yeah he thinks he can just walk all over me and I'll be a doormat like I was in the past when we were married....but you know what, I've found my voice again, and I know that I do not have to lie down and take that abuse (because that's exactly what it is, it's emotional abuse) so I am going to stand up for myself and for my kids, who need to be with their mother in our new apartment on christmas morning...
so yeah, I am not contacting him at all....I'm not going to call or text him....I am going to see if he actually contacts me without being reminded that oh hey he has kids...so we'll see...
oy...I've been really having to depend on God lately for calm....well I do that always but yeah even more so now...and I know that God has a plan for me, and He has someone out there for me who is everything He has for me...I have a few people that have gone all "holier then thou" on me saying oh I need to either stay single or marry the ex again....well honestly I completely disagree...I fully believe that God has a man out there for me...I have never once felt the Holy Spirit leading me to a life of singleness....and I've been praying about it like a lot....what people dont get is God is forgiving....people just look on the law...unforgiving side....but God is merciful, forgiving and loves unconditional, so yeah I got a divorce....I've repented and God is now bringing me down the path He originally intended, and I am being faithful...because honestly it's not between me, God and the world....it's simply between me and God...no one else knows what goes on between me and God so they have no room to judge...so yeah I've been dealing with that but now it is getting better, and things are going a lot better now....
God has been blessing me with so much, I'm growing in my church, my family and friends are amazing in helping and supporting me through all this.
anyway I'm not really going to be writing a whole lot about the ex unless I need to rant or something major comes up, but I did want the readers to know a little about the crap I'm dealing with right now...but yeah God is putting me back together and I know He's preparing me for something coming in the future and I cannot wait.
anyway that's pretty much all that's been going on...now I'm just trying to get everything ready for Christmas, and I've started a diet, the past 3 days I've lost 6lbs, so I'm on my way....this time I am bound and determined to go through with this, I'm doing this phase till Christmas, then after new years sometime I'll be going again to get to my ideal weight...I'm excited about getting down to that, I miss my normal food though...but hopefully when I'm all done with it I can eat my normal food...just less of it....lol...
so yeah that's about it...
Much Love
Krysten
